Today was a hectic day!!!! But here I am at 1.34am typing this entry. Just felt like coming here to leave some thoughts behind... :)
Went to school in the morning for 10am tutorial. So early!! ahaha, totally not used to going to school soo early. It ended early, went with gp and celia to the deck. Wanted to study for social psych mid term test, but in the end spent 45 mins trying to solve the problem with the CO concert tickets!! ARGH! When I met Elain yesterday to pass her the tickets, I actually gave her the wrong stack!!!! Gosh, how blur can I be! In the end, had to trouble her to come down all the way to redhill to meet me, and i had to go all the way up after my test! Sigh...This shows how you need to pay for carelessness. :( After meeting her, had to go back to school for full dress rehearsal, ended at 10plus, reached home near 12. Tired!
It will be the CO concert later!! (considering it's past 12am already.) Wow. So we've practiced for one year, all for this concert. Seems like such a long journey, yet it doesn't feel so. Honestly, I don't feel as if we've practiced alot. I guess I've been slacking too much during dazu and xiaozu! haha! And it doesn't help that there's no EC this year! (HAHA ok sorry i noe i've said this manyy times :P) And this year has definitely been more exciting, with more ups and downs. CO can be quite happening too yeah! Lol. Although some of the stuffs were not exactly happy, I've definitely laughed so much more, and enjoyed myself much more. All thanks to the suona ppl; I think they are really a group of humourous ppl to be around with!! :) They have livened up the atmosphere, and I think Zhang Lao Shi is really quite funny!! :D
I just feel, the atmosphere surrounding our dizi group is just...weird. Last year was more monotonous, but at least I didn't feel so...weird. I just don't know how to explain, and I'm not very clear how things became like this too. Sometimes we seem totally fine, and yet at times I feel as if we are all faking towards each other, not being totally honest with our true selves. Is it really so hard to be yourself?? I never really thought so much about this, until recently. And I realise, I am just not suited to be a faker. I don't feel good plastering a smile on my face and seeming as if i'm very friendly, when deep down inside I really don't feel like talking to the person. I'm not trying to infer anyone here, just talking in general terms yeah... I just wish that we can all be truthful to our feelings, like 就 like, dun like 就 dun like, why think so much, fake so much?
Ok la, sometimes I'll wonder if I've been thinking too much, if I should give people more chances. Afterall, I might not like a person's character, but that doesn't mean that I can't be friends with that person, right? We can be friends, just never good friends.
AIYO! I'm getting more and more confused as I type, haha, I think my brain really needs a good rest after the long day. Shall not deprive it of the sleep it needs! Signing off here.. Sayonara!! :)
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