I'm offffffffff to KL in a few hours time!!! YAYYY :D haha so excited about the shopping, and I'm sure it'll be fun with the girls and Mr Driver! :)) Going to throw all the unhappiness away, and just have fun!!

I felt the love from my friends these past few days <3 Everytime i am emo or down, there will always be people there for me. XIE XIE NI MEN! All those who have talked to me, heard me out.. I really really appreciate all the little words of concern and encouragement! :) Don't worry, Si Hui will be fine! :D

Haha what an upbeat post! I don't like to be emo-momo.. Ok it's time for me to finish up packing and go off to sleep! KL here i comeeeeeeeeeee! :))

I guess things have changed somehow...right? Although the irony is that i didn't plan for things to go this way, not yet. But i don't know, maybe things that are meant to happen just has to happen somehow, sometime?

Alot of things that i wanted to say, but just feel stuck all of a sudden. Shall share them again when the mood comes or something.


I really didn't mean to hurt anybody.
Be ok, okay? :)

I've realised, some things just don't seem to have an answer, just don't seem to have a solution, no matter how much you think about it. It's not like I've not tried, and it's not as if I didn't think about it; but i just don't know what I should do. Actually, to say that I'm not feeling stressed or pressurised would be telling a lie, cos I do. Maybe everything really started on the wrong footing? I don't know. Things don't always seem to go the way that we want them to go. :( I don't want to fool myself into thinking anything against my wishes, cos I know it will be unfair to all of us.

My friend told me, I'm choosing to hold on and not let go, is because 我害怕失去. I guess this is so true. 有些东西成了习惯之后，就会开始害怕失去. Afraid of losing the consistency, afraid of losing the chance. Even when the feeling doesn't seem right, even when I can't seem to see the light ahead, I'm still choosing to hold on. Have never been a decisive person since young, and I can't stand myself sometimes too. This feeling gets worse when I know it is affecting other people too, and I feel so so bad. Really. sorry. I understand how selfish it is, but I really have no idea what else to do at the moment.

But no matter what, thank you! :)) I somehow have the feeling that time is running out, don't know why too. Some self-imposed subconscious deadline? Maybe I should try to break into my subconscious level and see what I'm really thinking about, or maybe try to plant some idea into my head so I'll know what steps to take. HA.

Sorry for the above messy and probably meaningless thoughts. Just needed to rant. ROARRR!!!! Time to sleep now, BYEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeee!

I want to blog! But i have so many thoughts in my head, so many things i want to say, so many feelings swimming within me, i don't know where to start from. Shall do this another time then?

ahahaha.

I Liese-d my hair again today!! hahaha! Tried a lighter colour than last time, so it looks a liiitle bit more obvious this time. I just wanted a little difference to my hair, but don't want to spend the money to go to a salon to dye it. HAHA okay i sound so cheapo lol. But at least my hair don't look sooo black now, looks a little brighter? hehe :) but HMMM my scalp is feeling a little itchy, hope that it is not sensitive or what... hmmmm!

Borrowed some books from the library; feels like i haven't done proper leisure reading for veryyyy long, it's really time to. Convocation is coming this monday, the deadline that i gave myself to slack is nearing.... SIGH it's time to face the world. 究竟世界的哪一个角落，会有我容身之处呢？
:)

Ohoh i saw a rainbow today!! Was on the bus to meet gp for our super impromptu singing session, HAHA! Anw the rainbow was a really nice one, so clear and vivid. Niceeeeee (:

Will be going to buy the clothes and shoes i need for convocation tmr, hopefully everything goes well and I can finish my shopping by tmr! Saturday and sunday will be busy this week, with performance and chalet. Busy but happy i guess!! :)) Really really hope that i won't screw up the performance in any way, dont want to 越帮越忙 >.<

Alrightyy off to sleep!! byeee!

of friendships...

Just came back from a very 温馨 outing with a7bees (as quoted from kj haha). It was really nice to catch up with old frens, though most of them i still contact quite often la. :) I think it's really really nice that we can all chat and share like old times, that although we may not meet each other often, the feeling is still there! I always feel that the frenship btw A7Bees is always so hmm...simple and pure, it's something that i really REALLY treasure! :) So if any of you are reading this, love youuuu!! hahaha (:

I was sitting on the toilet bowl yesterday, and i was just suddenly thinking about friendships. AHAHA talk about being random :P Actually, i think that i have been rather lucky about friendships. In my different stages of life, there have been different friends by my side. Although some came and left, there are still those who came and stayed. :) To be truthful, i didn't really know how to treasure friendships when i was younger. Probably as I get older, then i start to realise the importance and preciousness of friendships. When you are young, you seem to take everything for granted, you assume that the person will always be with you, the person will always be there. As I grew older, i came to the realization that that is not the case. You need to put in efforts, you need to show your appreciation. Despite that, i can proudly say that I've always treated friends with a true heart, and many a time i get a true heart back too! :))

I had a very very good friend when i was in primary school. We would always partner each other, go for recess together, play together..I went to her house many times to play, and we even bathed together!! (Probably the first and last friend that i would do that with? haha!) I still rmb the times when we did silly things tgt, got punished tgt; she really was someone that i could talk to about anything under the sun. However, after primary 6, we got into different secondary schools, and we got separated :( We still kept in contact by calling each other at first, and i think we still met up. However, as we each got busy with our own lives, we started to distance apart, and contacted each other less and less frequently...It got to the point when I'll only msg her happy birthday once in a year, and we didn't even meet up for a loooong time. There are times when i'll think back, and I'll feel sad about how we turned out. We met up once last year, but somehow, i felt that bigggg gap between us. I guess the years have just pulled us apart further and further. I don't know if we'll ever become good friends again, but no matter what i will always treasure the friendship we once had. She seems to be doing rather well now, and i sincerely wish her all the best. And it was also a lesson for me, that friendships need to be maintained.

Now that I'm moving onto a new journey and milestone in life, i wonder if the friendships i've had in school would change. Will we, as we start meeting less and contact less, get further and further from each other? :( Sometimes, i really dread changes, and goodbyes especially. sighh, why can't good times always last forever!!! Aiya i know la, life is all about moving on, about improving ourselves, about balances... We all have to grow up someday; no use lamenting about things that we can't control right?

Let me end this post with a simple but heartfelt message to all my friends reading this! No matter who you are, thank you for being part of my life, thank you for all the memories we've had together! :)) I'm thankful for all the light you've shone into my life, no matter how dim it may be. Please bear with all my faults, we will be friends forever okay? :D

Hahahaha okay la shall stop being mushy, IT'S TIME FOR BED! SAYONARA! :)))))